21 feb 2026, 10:21am
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uhh yea idk how its been exactly a month since i last wrote an entry but i guess my motivational levels are just regular like that
tons of stuff happened and ive been busy with my art project, of which im just finishing up prep 7 ^o^ proud of myself for making so much progress, but the grind never stops ..
i noticed how i've been a little lost on what to actually draw in my free time now that i spend so much time doing fine arts and all that. even in my free study periods i go to the art studio to work on my project, and while that has paid off somewhat i realised nowadays i don't really do my own art anymore.
recently i had a consultation with my university counsellor and they encouraged me to think more on my personal projects outside of art classes, and so it's constantly been on my mind since then. i decided that fuck it i'll just go ahead and start working on my story project that i've long abandoned because i could never be satisfied with it. but even now i'm still struggling to get started since it's been so long since i've done something like this.
but once i get enough down i think i'll make a separate site for my portfolio. it'll be cool to create a site for reasons other than personal pursuits, but for now i actually have to grow my ideas first ..
i've been trying to "study" other animangas in an attempt to dissect how they tell their stories, build characters, etc. but i can't really say how much it's worked for me in terms of getting ideas for my own stories. speaking of, i just finished episode 7 of jjk's third season last night and safe to say i understood as much as i would've with subs turned off. jokes aside mappa is doing wonders again with the animation direction in general. it's perfectly surreal and gives so much atmosphere to even the simplest of scenes. i'll try to properly do a media log once the episodes have fully aired tho
but anyways. last week i came back home for a week-long school break and holidays in general but im flying back tomorrow already. it feels so quick and being back at home has made me lazy again, i dread going back to school and i dont even want to think about going to the airport again. but ngl i miss being in school with my friends .. never thought id say that
this morning i woke up with the dread of going back and its been plaguing me for a while so i decided to write this entry ig. mocks are coming up and while it's only for one subject i have not been studying .. its awful
every other week or so the stress and realisation just hits me TT
right now im trying to finish my art assignment because i've been slacking for the past week and haven't found the motivation to work on it. if u couldnt tell im that kind of person that works on adrenaline oops
as for bonyou i haven't found the time nor motivation to work on it much either. i've been thinking about turning it into a iframe-less site with different layouts for different pages now because i realise that while iframes make creating new pages much much easier than formatting inblog-entryidual pages one by one, it gets really repetitive after a while. its like yk i dont put alot of effort into the pages so it doesn't feel satisfying to work on the site. so yeah once i find the time i'll probably get to reworking the site. it's going to be a challenge tracking all the links that are gonna break once i move stuff around .. maybe i should plan this out first ..
its just that even during holidays i have work to do and i always feel guilty when im not doing work, because i know i'll just panic at the last minute. but ahh one day .. one day (dont trust me)